The Tribal Tomato

The alpha to lambda of losing weight in the New Year

One of the good things about getting older is you tend to wise up to your youthful, immature ways.

Like how I would drink and eat myself silly through most of November and December, and then resolve to lose weight in the New Year. Enter diet/gym membership/gadget bought from telemarketing channel at 2 in the morning. Generally, my resolve would be strong for the first few weeks in January, start to slow down in February --  then I would return to my wicked ways come March. And so the excessive eating cycle continued. It was okay when I was younger – my metabolism forgave me. Not so as I got into my thirties and forties. I racked up a few kilos each year – and before I knew it, I was tipping the ‘obese’ side of the scales.

In Australia, we are spending many billions of dollars each year on gym memberships, diets and ‘superfoods’, yet our waistlines are still expanding. Within the next ten years, it is estimated close to four in five of us will be overweight or obese.

Many of us are trying to fight it. According to the Australian Bureau of Statistics, around 2.3 million Australians 15 years+ were on a diet during 2011/12.

It doesn't help that we are surrounded by high calorie, cheap and negligibly-nutritious food everywhere we look – in our supermarkets, on television and on every shopping strip. While it may not be our fault that we are getting fatter as a population, it doesn’t mean we should take it lying down. 

It’s easy to understand the appeal of the instant fix diet/latest pill/light-meals-delivered-to-your-doorstep solutions. But the problem with these is that they cost money, aren’t generally in keeping with our lifestyle, and are based on deprivation. And so, it’s no surprise they fail.

So what have I learnt as I’ve gotten older and wiser about the weight thing? Here's my alpha to lambda guide on managing weight and enjoying food...

1. Obsessively counting calories, going on fad diets and eating only ‘lite foods’ is well and truly a waste of time – if anything these things lead to weight gain over time.
2. Weight gain is generally about simple maths - if the amount of energy going in is higher than the energy going out, the weight goes on – so if I indulge a little in December, I need to go back to my more balanced eating ways soon after – on most days, for most of the year.
3. Movement is key – I mindfully move as much as I can throughout the day, doing things I enjoy with people I like to be around.
4. If it’s okay with grandma, it’s okay with me – and so I mainly choose foods my grandma or great grandma would have recognised as real food – that means avoiding stuff that comes from a packet/has too much added sugar/fat/salt or that has a stack of ingredients grandma wouldn't recognise. Vegetables, pulses, wholegrains, fruit and nuts – these make up the bulk of my daily diet.
5. I try to minimise how much I eat out - and when I do, I try and have smaller portions, and stick to 'grandma' food
6. I try to listen to my hunger and eat accordingly. I'm still working on this one.
7. My snacks of choice are fruit and nuts. It's surprisingly easy once you get into a routine.
8. I'm mindful of my emotional eating triggers (boredom, hormones, mindlessness...). I don't always overcome them, but I'm at least aware of them. 
9. Water is my drink of choice. I have tea and coffee daily.  Wine in moderation. That's it. 
10. I try to enjoy food  in company most of the time. 
11. I’m learning to accept my body (lumps, bumps and all) as I get older – the best weight for me is when I feel comfortable in my skin, I can move easily, and I have enough energy to keep up with my life.

My parting words of weighty wisdom as the New Year approaches – eat real food, enjoy it in company, move as much as you can, and listen to your body.

Have you got any wise words coming into the New Year?

Why can't I live my fantasy?

At this time, of year, I fantasise about lying on a hammock with a glass of wine. There's some crusty, just-baked bread dipped in olive oil on a table beside me. I have a great book in my hand, and more waiting where that one came from. I’ve just finished hanging a sign on the washing machine that says, ‘On holidays. Back in three weeks.’ No one is wanting anything from me. In fact, every now and then, someone (my dear husband perhaps) asks me if there's anything I'd like. I respond by saying that I need a foot massage. Of course, he quickly obliges.

I lie. It’s not just at this time of year that I have such a fantasy – this is my #1 Year-round Stock Standard Fantasy. The last time I spent a whole day reading was in the summer of 1984. If I could bottle that feeling, I would.

Part of being a responsible adult generally means that your weeks (months, years) are spent working hard to get a whole bunch of things done. Most of the reading I do these days is done late at night. Instead of a glass of wine, I have a mug of chamomile (winter) or a glass of water (summer) beside me. I’m usually quite tired, and I’m lucky if I get through a few chapters.

Why can’t I live my fantasy?

Reason #1: Parenting duties

Anyone who is a parent or knows a parent understands that parenting duties never stop. They start first thing in the morning (often with negotiations to get the teen out of bed in our case), and they don’t end until late at night (GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND INTO BED - NOW!). And there’s all the stuff in between (see ‘domestic duties’ below).

Reason #2: Domestic duties

I think if I crunched the numbers on how many loads of washing needed to be done, how many times the floors needed to be cleaned or how many meals needed to be cooked in a lifetime, I would want to lay down and never get up again. Enough said.

Reason #3: Paid work

Paid work is what I do to help pay off the mortgage, have enough money to outsource occasional foot massages, and hopefully, fill my life with some sort of purpose in addition to that which includes the words 'chores' and ‘Mum’. My paid work involves teaching and writing. My work is enjoyable and fulfilling most days. Part of me wants to say that I’m lucky – but I’ve worked hard to get to such a good place. Work is great, but it still takes up time. Lots of it.

While all of the above is happening, I am also trying to keep both myself and my family healthy – for me, this means eating well, being as active as we can, connecting meaningfully with each other and those in our circle, and getting enough time out to do the things that we love.

I often fantasise about having more time out, but I’ve come to the realise that I actually like working hard. The things I expend the most energy on also seem to reap the most rewards - if the family, home and creative space are in good order, I'm a happy woman.

The good thing is that working hard means I get to really enjoy the respite when it comes.

So, for the record, here’s what’s going to happen on Boxing Day.

I am going to spend a full day on the hammock, even it hurts my back.

I’m going to drink as much wine as I feel like, even if I regret it the next day.

I’m going to get through the first of the books in my summer reading pile. One. Delicious. Word. At. A. Time.

And maybe, just maybe, I'm going to ask for a foot massage. Honey, if you’re reading this, what are my chances?

Here’s to a very fulsome, fruitful and restive 2017